Kamusta ka?

Ok lang naman ako.
Ikaw?
Ok lang din.
....

I dont get it when people answer this question with "ok lang". I just dont want to stop with "ok lang". Pwede naman kasing dagdagan natin ng "...masaya kasi pinansin niya ko kanina at dahil na-ace ko ang exam ko." Anyway, I know this applies to friends who are really friends. As in close CLOSE friends. There's a different story when you still dont fully know the character of the person you are talking with.

Kamusta na ba ako?
UHM... MASAYA na MEDYO (sobrang unti lang naman) malungkot.

Masaya dahil malapit na ang kaarawan ko. It's not the day of my birthday that excites me. It's the days before my big day. I actually appreciate all these small things that come my way. Having lunch with the people I barely know, listening to good music in a jeepney ride to school, making people happy with my corny jokes, hitting the high notes that i thought i would never reach - stuff like that. As days pass by parang I am obliged to do the things I want to do and the things I think I need to do before turning 20.

So where did I get this line of thingking? Well, I got it from my friend's dad. Sabi kasi niya na we should do all the crazy stuff or at least do the unusual things in life before we reach 20. Be adventurous, get drunk (literally and figuratively), be spontaneous, be reckless (to a certain degree), be able to enjoy and explore life and it makes sense to me. 20 is the time when you can no longer find "teen" attached to your age. This is also the transition period to the real and more harsh world we are in. So, in conclusion I want to do the things that would make me happy before turning 20. :)

So why am I sad? I dont really want to dwell about this thing but yeah might as well vent it out here.

....

I am just wondering if design's really meant for me. I like to pursue design but I love to sing and act. I find joy when designing but I easily get down when things are not in may favor. I know, there's no such perfect thing in world. Not every thing will appear they way you wanted it to be but in the state I am right now - I am not finding joy in what I'm doing. Pero hindi pa naman ako nawawalan ng pag-asa. I hope na this is just a phase where designers really get bored with the repetition of work we're doing. Maybe I am just tired and I just need to unwind. I hope. :)

And, Have you ever had a feeling where you pretend to be ok with another person even if its really not? Or just thinking that it's better to not talk to that person so it wont fuel your feelings? Just thinking. :) :P

Anyway, that's merely what I've been doing these past few days.

In life there would always be ups and downs. Tao din ako, nalulungkot. Pero the sense of enjoyment that I am feeling now is making me see the glass half full. Yes, downs will always be there but as I have said I appreciate all the small things so keri na ang mga down moments. This too shall pass!

Cheerios! SMILE!